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        Your Mass and You: A Young Sload's Guide to the Facts of Life

A neutral and non-hostile salutation to you reader. No doubt you are reading this as part of careful preparation for the changes you have been told will be happening to your body. Your foresight is adequate.

The first change to look for is your mass. Although it has been steadily growing your entire life, the rate of change will increase rapidly for a variable period. Your mucus coating will also become thinner, but the consistency will increase and possibly change colour. In addition, there will be phalli in places there weren't phalli before.

These changes will be accompanied by acceptable levels of pain or discomfort, and thus should have little impact on your daily schedule. The change to be wary of is the mustheat.

It can strike at any time during your years of change. Within seconds your senses will heightened far beyond normal parameters. You will become intensely aware of other Sload around you. Most will hold little interest for you, but if a companion is also in mustheat your focus will be uncontrollably drawn to them. Sadly, any project you were working on will be ignored as you both commence mating and attempt to piece the other with one or more phalli.

During this act you will experience pleasurable sensations, perhaps as some sort of compensation for the time you have wasted doing it. It is difficult to describe in Sload, but warm bloods frequently give in to their base emotions and thus have words to reflect them, so I will quote the Redguard poet Zanir, who once witnessed the act:

WHY GODS WHY! WHY WOULD YOU LET THIS EXIST!? It was like watching two screaming, moaning cow stomachs stuffed with yogurt trying to fuck each other with tent pegs.

Our emotion scholars assure me that this is a passion filled statement which conveys many feelings.