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        Way too easy to do in this game, you don't need to kill smelter demon, gargoyles or even ancient dragon, weird huh.
Discovering means get the yes/no confirmation box to pop up, don't join the covenant just discover it (unless it says to join it).

- Pick cleric class, start with Bonfire Ascetic
! Apparently making a character is an achievement - Self Recollection
- Don't drop your clothes
- Run to majula, light the bonfire
- Learn gesture from Saulden
! Discover Way of the Blue Covenant - Covenant of the Meek

- Whatever you do DON'T Murder Maughlin
! Discover Company of Champions Covenant - Covenant of the Fittest

- Pick up bones by the tablet
- Pick up crimson parma
- Light first bonfire in heide ruins
? We're killing dragon rider twice because I haven't thought of a better way to fix not having the tseldora set 
? You probably can even do the stuff with felkin more optimally but whatever this is fast enough and you're going to take at least 12 hours to do this run so minor stuff I'll iron out later
@ Kill Dragon Rider with fall off strats
- Send Cleric lady back to Majula
- Warp back to 1st bonfire, burn ascetic, warp back to second
@ Kill Dragon Rider...again...with fall off strats
- Warp to Majula
 
- Go towards cardinal tower bonfire
- Buy 3 amber herbs, 10 lifegems, 5 firebombs and blacksmith key 
- Select TALK from her menu to get silver serpent ring +1
- TALK to her enough to get her to appear in Majula
- Use firebomb to unlock shortcut
- Go talk to Cale the Cartographer and send him back to Majula, bone back
- Put the silver ring on and pop souls on elevator down to...
@! Beat up Last Giant with mace - Last Giant

- Take elevator back up, pop soul on elevator
@ Parry, ballista and lob a firebomb to kill Persuer
- Take eagle ride, warp back to Majula

- Level up at least 13 ATU, 22 FTH and 20 INT
- Unlock blacksmith
- Head towards Huntsman's Copse
- Pop Persuer Soul and put on Ring of Blades 
- Pick up Rogue Water
- Buy the Archdrake Chime, Great Resonant Soul and Resonant Soul from Felkin
- TALK to Felkin for the sweet hood and staff (and put the hood on)
- Light bonfire under the bridge (for chariot later)
- Attune Resonant Soul
- Get key to last bonfire in area, talk to Creighton a bunch then learn gesture
@ Kill skeleton lords with reso soul and the archdrake chime

- Smash skele lord soul
- Light bonfire next to ore lady
- Talk to ore lady to send her back to Majula
- Pick up one large titanite shard here, maybe a chunk as well
- Grab Chameleon, you know where that is right
- Warp back to Majula
- Upgrade your Archdrake chime to +4
- Level up 25 FTH few ATU
- Attune GRS, warp back to huntsman's copse
@ Kill Covetous Demon

- Fully talk to Lucatiel
@ Kill Medusa lady

- Pop all your souls on the elevator 
- Warp back to Majula, Level up 20 ATU, and equal INT/FTH
? Always leave 4k souls after leveling so you can cast your good hexes 
- Attune both great reso and normal reso, warp back to Iron Keep
- Grab Pharros Lockstone by the water urns
- Grab the Dull Ember
- Unlock the way to belfry sol, light the bonfire, head towards iron king
? You can get to old iron king without going through belfry sol, by doing an angled roll from the top of the ladder, I've seen it done
@ Kill Old Iron King (use a herb probably)
! Primal bonfire back to Majula - Iron Keep Bonfire

- Upgrade chime to whatever you can (ore lady sells large titanite now)
- Level up some 12 STR, rest into INT/FTH but leave some souls for the shield...
- Warp to Lost Bastille
- Talk to lucatiel fully
- Open up McDuff's workshop, light the torch in it, rest at bonfire
- Walk back inside and and give him the ember and buy the better shield
@ Go kill Ruin Sentinels
- Pick up Hush behind the secret walls

- Summon Lucatiel and BOOK it to the boss, make sure she doesn't die
? NPCs do not need to be in the boss room when the fight is over to receive credit on boss kills
@ Kill Lost Sinner
- Pick up the branch after him in the chest
! Use primal bonfire - Sinner's Bonfire

- Buy Soul Appease and Dead again from ore lady
- Attune GRS and Soul Appease
- Level up ATU some but leave souls for...
- Buy cat ring, ring of whispers and redeye ring and 10 bones and some skulls
- Head towards Grave of Saints
- Pick up Pharros Lockstone in the well
- Pick up Whisper of Despair
@ Kill Royal Rat Vanguard with Soul Appease / GRS
! Join the rat covenant - Gnawing Covenant

- Go towards rotten
- Pick up Dark Fog and Branch of Yore on way to Rotten
- Light first bonfire in Black Gulch
- Grab Scraps of Life (in front of first worm)
- REST at second bonfire in Black Gulch
- Fully talk to Lucatiel
- Kill the giants that drop forgotten Key, bone back
- Talk to Abyss NPC, bone back
- Pick up Pharros Lockstone (in pot, right next to bonfire)
- Summon Lucatiel for the boss, make sure she doesn't die
@ Kill The Rotten (use a herb)
! Use Primal bonfire - Gulch Bonfire

- You can level up but you need to leave 25k souls
- Grab GLS, the witchtree branch and Soul Vortex in the well (all 3 chests)
- Attune scraps of life
- Head towards shaded woods
- Buy effigies, Traveling Merchant Hat and life gems from Hag Melentia
- Fully talk to Benhart
- Unpetrify pyro lady
- Pull lever, scraps to kill all the mobs
! Give her a full set of clothes - Change of Clothes
- Buy all of her pyromancy spells, and some small orange burrs and that ring

- Take crossroads bonfire
- Head through misty woods
- Pick up Clear Bluestone Ring +1 in misty woods (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdHvGgEAfhg)
- Light bonfire in shaded ruins
- Talk to Abyss NPC and loot Homing Soulmass from chest, run out of cave
@ Kill Scorpion Lady


~~~~~~~
Good time to mention, don't smash these souls, you need them for spells later on

Royal Rat Vanguard Soul
Royal Rat Authority Soul
Soul of Velstadt
Scorpioness Najka Soul
Ruin Sentinel Soul (well you can smash your first one)
Old Witch Soul
Old King Soul
Old Dead One Soul
Old Paledrake Soul
Darklurker Soul
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

- Attune Dead Again and Scraps of Life, equip your staff
- Pick up Twisted Barricade in Doors of Pharros
@ Kill Royal Rat Authority with Scraps of Life / Great Reso

- Attune Dark Fog and GRS 
- Summon Benhart, he's "At the Royal Army Campsite in one of the nearby tents", don't let him die
@ Kill the Prowling Magus with your spells

- Attune GRS, RS and Scraps of Life
@ Kill Freja
- Kill The Duke and Vengarl's Body
! Use Primal Bonfire - Brightstone Bonfire

- Warp back to before Freja
- Go grab Great Fireball (in room with all the spiders and the lever, you have the key to the door)
- Warp to forked road
- Head towards Drangleic Castle
- Pick up Repair (it's on the way)
- Loot Great Combustion from the chest as the drangleic gates open
- Take first bonfire in Castle
- Talk to Abyss NPC (farest left door in room with many doors that need enemies killed next to them to open)
! Join covenant and put on Abyss Ring (extra hex damage wooo) - Abysmal Covenant
- Pick up Twinkling Titanite in mask room
@ Murder Dragon Riders

- Talk to Benhart fully, learn his gesture
- Grab Caitha's Chime and Soul Greatsword
- Grab the 10 Flame Butterflies in room where you pull the lever to lower the gate (don't go up THE LADDER)
- Pop all the souls on the big long elevator up
- Warp back to Majula for leveling
- Upgrade the Caitha's Chime to +8
- Pick up Twinkling Titanite on way to Mirror Knight
- Summon Benhart for this fight, make sure he doesn't die
@! Murder Mirror Knight - Looking Glass Knight
- Pick up Soul Bolt in the chest after mirror knight

- Now we're in Shrine of Amana
- Pick up Fire Tempest (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nz8VwU6C9w)
- Pick up Homing Crystal Soulmass (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jobTk65b8E)
@ Murder Demon of Song

- Talk to Grave Warden Agdayne and buy all of his spells (and some shrooms I guess)
- Also learn his gesture
- Pick up Crushed Eye Orb
@ Murder Garl Vinland (Velstadt)
! Pick up the King's Ring - King's Ring

- Warp to Majula
- Ore lady at this point sells a lot of upgrade materials at this point
- Buy  bonfire ascetic, all her twinklies and like 8 infusion stones (at least 1 boltstone and 1 darkstone) from ore lady, talk for another twinkling, and enough upgrade materials to +10 both chimes and upgrade your shield a bunch
- Upgrade the Cleric's Sacred Chime to +10, Caitha's Chime to +10 and shield to as high as you can
! Upgrading a weapon to +10 was an achievement - Supreme Weapon

- Also level up yo, make sure to have 49 FTH by now
- Warp to first bonfire in Black Gulch
- Burn Ascetic (you only do this once, not twice like in all bosses)
- Clear Darklurker dungeon
- Kill the giants for another Soul of a Giant, bone back
- Warp to Shaded Ruins
- Talk to Manscorpion Tark with the whisper ring on to obtain gesture, bone back
- Do Abyss Side Dungeon
- Warp and do the Drangleic Darklurker dungeon
@ Do the rest of the Darklurker stuff then murder him with Great Lightning Spear

- Talk to Abyss NPC for another Great Reso Soul and Climax and Dragon Chime
- Buy Profound Still and ALL of his effigies and ascetics from him as well
! This also maxed out a covenant so you get - Selfless Giver

- Warp to McDuff, infuse a bunch of gear, need to spend 14,000 on infusing
- Upgrade Dragon chime to +2/+3, upgrade shield to however high you can get it 
- Make sure to infuse lightning on dragon chime and dark on caitha's chime
! Talk to him to get his love - Smith for Life

- Attune Climax and dark storm
- Warp to Huntsman's Copse
- Pick up the token of fidelty by the bonfire
@ Murder Executioner's Chariot (CLIMAAAAAAAAX)
! Talk to Titchy Gren to join Brotherhood of Blood - Sanguinary Covenant
- Buy all his pyromancies
- Someone says Delicate String might make mad warrior spawn more often, no idea

- Warp to Dragon Rider bonfire
- ATTUNE SON
- Fully talk to Lucatiel
- Talk to Cahrillion of the Fold, buy ALL of his spells and herbs
- TALK to him a bunch to send him back to Majula
! You sent everyone to Majula, hurray - Gathering of Exiles

- Summon Lucatiel for the boss, make sure she doesn't die (haha)
@ Kill Flexile Sentry
- Pick up pyro glove, bone back

@ Murder Old Dragonslayer
! Talk to guy who can only see blue and discover what being blue is all about (blue his house with a blue little window and a blue corvette...) - Protector Covenant
- Also learn his gesture (join if he won't teach it to you otherwise)

- Warp to Forked Road, go talk to Vengarl and get his gesture
! Obtain's Vengarl's Helmet - Reflections of Disembodiment

! Talk to Lucatiel in front of Aldia's Keep to get her gear - Lucatiel's Trophy
- If you somehow haven't gotten the gesture from her yet, get it now
- Grab Soul Geyser in Aldia's Keep (in acid pool)
@ Murder Guardian Dragon

- Obtain Aged Feather
- Obtain Petrified Dragon Egg
- Pick up Crystal Magic Weapon in the chest next to the egg
! Acquire Ashen Mist Heart - Ancient Dragon

- Go up to the Pursuer area giant memory, talk to benhart fully there
- Go into the memory and talk to benhart fully there
- Finish Memory for a soul of a giant
- Go back to Memory of Jeigh
- Summon Benhart in giant memory, don't let him die
@ Murder Giant Lord

- Go back up to benhart, the bugger
! Fully talk to captain drummond to get his hat - Holder of the Fort
- Also learn his gesture

@! Kill Vendrick - Vendrick

@ Murder Those POS Throne Watchers (super easy)

@ Murder Nashandra
- POP SOULS WHILE WAITING FOR ENDING
! Watch ending - The Heir
? Go to the bathroom

- Buy all of Carhillion of the Fold's spells
- Level up 54 FTH, rest into VGR/END probably but leave 35k souls 
- Buy the 12,000 soul ladder from ladder guy and the miniature ladder
- Learn his gesture
! TALK to him to get his gear - Garrulous Miser

! Go talk to Cale in the mansion fully to get his gear - Curious Map

- Go invade Licia and kill her for Soothing Sunlight
- Warp to Belfry Sol
! Join Belfry Covenant - Clangorous Covenant
- Be offline and farm 20 mad warrior kills (wikis say 30 but we saw someone get it with 24-26 kills and I did like 20-23 kills)
- Have the bellkeeper ring on (and maybe delicate string)
- Rest at bonfire 6 times then check if he's there, rest 6 times again and check again, kill him if he's there
- Grab Immolation in the chest while you're here
- Talk to leader to obtain Hidden Weapon (best spell in Dark Souls 1 returns)

- Warp to first Bonfire in Iron Keep
! Join Dragon Covenant - Covenant of Ancients
- Buy Fall Control, Dark Hail, Darkstorm, a Branch of Yore and 5 Rusted Coins from Magerold
- TALK to him to get the +item drop ring

- Warp to Harvest Valley
- Farm 30 sunlight medals from the big guys (use ascetics to respawn them, and have the ring on and rusted coins and the monocle)
- The falconers in NG+ in the tutorial area also drop them, DROP rate there might be higher, maybe
- If you fully clear out the area of giants, don't burn an ascetic, just go NG+ and try falconers
! Join Heirs to the Sun Covenant - Brilliant Covenant
- Learn gesture from the statue
? You can use that ring from them whenever you use miracles on a boss
- Offer the 30 medals for Sunlight Spear

- Go NG+

@ Last giant

@ Pursuer

@ Ruin Sentinels

- Unpetrify Straid, buy every spell he sells and trade every boss soul for every spell, rouge waters, also buy Ring of Knowledge (maybe put it on?)
- TALK to him for the Black Hood, put it on, it's baller
- Learn gesture from him
- Attune Lifedrain Patch, use it on bosses that stand still enough for it to hit, like rotten or velstadt, try it out, it's BALLER
@ Sinner

@ Dragon Rider

- Buy all of Licia's Spells, talk to her to move her
- Buy all of Felkin's Spells
@ Skellington Lords
- Send Ore lady back to Majula (for 4 twinklies later)
@ Covetous Demon
@ Mytha

- Attune Flash sweat and get Chaos Storm (you can do this on NG++ actually, the guardian dragon on NG+ drops fire resist ring +2, so it would actually be easier to do it then)
@ Old Iron King

@ Rotten
@ Scorpion Lady
@ Prowling Magus
- Buy all of Cromwell the Pardoner's spells
@ Freja
@ Bunch of mandatory bosses
@ Velstadt

- Warp back to Straid and buy Sunlight Blade from him AND trade the rest of your boss souls for spells
! ALL HEXES YAAAAAAAY - Master of Hexes

- Go toward's aldia's keep, die if you're fully human
- Talk to Navlaan while undead to finish his quest and open his shop
- Buy all of Navlaan's spells
! ALL SORCERIES YAAAAAAAY - Master of Sorcery

- FINISH REST OF GAME
- NG++
- DO IT ALL AGAIN UP TO DRANGLEIC CASTLE

- Talk to chancellor Wellager
! Learn final gesture - Gesture Maestro
- Buy all his spells
! ALL PYROMANCIES YAAAAAAAY - Master of Pyromancies
! ALL MIRACLES YAAAAAAAY - Master of Miracles
! ALL ACHIEVEMENTS YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY - The Dark Soul

- Play 30 minutes of ads
- Go outside